So I'm looking into getting a different doctor than I currently have. I went to see him today about the extreme pain I have in my knees and express to him that i believe they are bothering me so bad because I worked yesterday. Now I didn't go in there with the intention of getting work off tomorow (although I would have loved it) what I was looking for was some solution to the problem of me being too exauhsted/in pain after work to carry on with the rest of my day and the fact that I don't think it's healthy (in a holistic view because according to my doctor "my pain isn't caused by any real cause" so I should pretty much work through it) for a 20 year old to have to second guess whether she's going to walk up a flight of stairs or not to get to her bedroom.
Basically his answer was i'm too young not to work and that I need to tough this out - all I really am looking for is a chance to recover and be the best situation I can to go back to work and being succesfull in continuing employment.
Right now I feel almost like quiting my job. However... I know that I can't do that because I'll lose my health benifits... is there anything I can do... I don't want to live my life for work I want to work to live my life... working shouldn't make your quality of life lower it should only be used to increase the quality of life. That in reality is the balance that one should concider on the terms of working. You have to ask youself "If I was totally healthy living under these circumstances would I be able to tollerate it, or would I choose to quit and search for another option of employment that would make my life easier... if I had the ability to leave and still support my standard of living by other means would I." At this moment I am asking myself that... do I really have to wait until I get really sick before anybody will take me seriosly?
*cough* I'm intending of adapting this as a letter to the local hospital and also give this letter to the CEO of the company I work for, and email it to all my co-workers and manager... (I may scale back those efforts depending on how succesful they seem when I'm not baked out of my head)
If the mods take this part about weed I understand the legal gramifications on their part. But I must say I am smoke weed everyday and am baked out of my mind right now, and I have come to one of the biggest realizations of my life right now :P lol
My blog is http://muffinsforsale.blogspot.com/ if anybody is interested in reading what I have to say further on the subject... it's telling the story of my life with Fibro from "almost" the first day it started :P I'm just intersted on feedback and suggestions - I really want to be able to fight this... but I need people to help... and people who understand.
Thanks for listening.
**HappyThoughts
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